Am I The Only One Whose Mind Is In The Gutter?

Can this even be for real?

"Mexican Breakfast", Helpfully Explained

Too funny.

Swoon

I don't want to give the impression that I'm starstruck or spend a lot of my time drooling over celebrities. I love my tabloids, true, but usually only to poke fun and sling derision at the stars...because that somehow makes me feel better about my own puny little life. Shallow, yes, I know. Whatever helps you get through the day, right?

But, while surfing this morning, I came across this picture of Christian Bale and...I really feel the need to share it because -- wow. Just wow.

I'm gonna have to shut up now, otherwise I'll start waxing poetic and never stop. The man's just yummy. Ay the hell caramba.

Uh, What?

Between my stepdaughter, who's doing her level best to flunk out of college and go nowhere in life, Jimmy-crack-corn-and-she-don't-care, and Justin Gaston, who must surely be the most vapid fool on the planet, I am seriously, SERIOUSLY starting to worry about the future of our world. I hope other countries are doing better jobs of raising their young than we are. Bah.

Cleaning House

I should be doing laundry but instead I'm cleaning out my saved bookmarks and came across this.

There's one question where none of the answers fit me, so I had to improvise and I erred on the goody-two-shoes side. Other than that, I tried to be honest. Here's my result.
Thought it was kinda funny since I'm a Leo in this life.

I Want One

Okay, now maybe I get George Clooney's unhealthy attachment to his potbellied pig. Is there any other kind of pig, by the way? Besides potbellied?


Kingsford Goes to the Beach - Celebrity bloopers here

What Fresh Hell Is This?

I was gonna do a post on the van I saw on the way to my kids' school this morning. It had a giant personalized 12"x18" (at least) car magnet that said:

BE A THIEF
GET SHOT

in huge red block letters. But my rassenfrassen cell phone camera wasn't working so I couldn't get a pic. You'll have to take me at my word that it was prominently displayed on the back of this van...right next to an NRA sticker. Ah, Texas. Where the guns are plenty and the brains are few. Since I'll probably never see this van again, I had to mention it.

Instead, I want to talk about this:

Is it not enough that I have to be subjected to Billy Mays and Anthony Sullivan when they're hawking lame cleaning products on regular TV? Now the Discovery Channel's doing a show on them too? Where is the interest here? Who...cares?What's worse is that my husband is actually interested in watching this tripe (and has actually set it to record on our DVR!). My erudite, deep and cerebral husband...was totally entranced by Pitchmen last night. He was fascinated at the sight of Billy Mays when he wasn't "on" (as in, shrieking frantically at the camera). Honestly, though -- he's effective, I'll give him that. I've often been heard to say, "If Billy Mays says it's a winner, I want it." Oxyclean, Orange Glo, Kaboom...all have made it in to my house (Orange Glo is crap, by the way; use Bona instead).

And here's how dumb (I mean, naive) I am. I thought Billy Mays was involved in the inventing of all his products. I thought that's why and how he was able to bellow so convincingly about the benefits of, say, Zorbees. Turns out, he's just a mouthpiece (quelle shocker!) for lame inventions cooked up in kitchens across America by regular folk just like you and me. How do you like that?

I wonder when they're gonna bring the Sham-Wow guy on board (or is he still locked up for beating up on hookers)?